This is a collaborative post.

Are you a chatterbox like me or rather quiet and reserved? Here I wanted to share with you 10 tips to help you chat to anyone if you want to come out of your shell a little more. I also want to share a little about chatting with some research of how we communicate that I found interesting.

My thoughts on communicaton?

In my opinion, being able to communicate is really important. I have seen first hand with Ben as he was younger and couldn’t speak, and now as a 17-year-old who still struggles to speak to people he doesn’t know and in difficult situations. His autism really affects his communication skills but he is improving in time with lots of support.

I was always quite shy when I was young and then in my teen years became more of a chatterbox. Now I can pretty much chat to anyone and I am quite an open chatty person. There are, of course, times when it is harder but on the whole, I can chat (and often not stop!) with anyone!

Are different communication methods easier?

Personally, I find emailing clients easier than phone conversations as I am too nice and sometimes agree to less money if people ask me on the phone. When it comes to friends though I am better on the phone and can chat for hours but often forget to text people back!

In my opinion, who you are communicating with, your age, and your personal preferences are what most affect your choices in methods of communication.

What does the research say?

Call Care, who outsource customer service, did some research about the ways we communicate. I guess if you outsource customer services you need to know who are the best chatters and who to avoid. It also makes sense to know how people prefer to communicate so you can offer customer services by email, text, etc. I much prefer being able to log on to Amazon chat for example if an item arrives broken!

Do you use a landline still? I know we don’t and when we moved house and got a new number we didn’t actually give it to anyone so if it rings we know it is a scam call, or Sky (our provider!). We still find having that phone handy because you never know when in an emergency you may need it.

If you are like me then we are in the majority with 30.8% of respondents saying they have a landline they don’t use and 22.6% not having one at all. So over half of the people asked don’t use a landline!

If you want to contact someone then what method is the first you choose? If it is Whatsapp then you are with 34.7% of people according to the study! The lowest response was voice notes with just 0.4% of responses. To be fair I rarely use voice notes but I think it has its benefits, usually, I do it if I have a lot to say and minimal time!

The following infographic shares some other statistics for you about the frequency of communications people use.

10 tips to help you chat to anyone

Are you someone who communicates with strangers often or perhaps it is something you rarely do and that makes you nervous? Do you look at others and wish you oozed as much confidence as they do?

Here are 10 tips to help you chat to anyone more comfortably whether you know them or not.

  • Remember the purpose of your conversation – is it to arrange something, complain about something or a friendly chat? Remembering the purpose will make it easier to know what to say, keep relating back to the purpose.
  • The person you are speaking to may be just as shy as you – remember whoever you are speaking to may not be as confident as you imagine.
  • Imagine the person you are speaking to is wearing pyjamas, sitting on the toilet or lying on a sunbed. Instead of seeing them as important and in a suit perhaps, remember they are only human and they do all these things too.
  • Choose the method of communication that is most appropriate and fits the purpose and your preferences. There is no reason you have to call to make a complaint if an email is just as effective then do that.
  • Practice making small talk when you go shopping. If small talk is what you find difficult then practising then when you go shopping can make it come much easier.

  • If you struggle to remember names and that makes you nervous then find a few phrases or words you can use for anyone. I tend to call people things like “my lovely” if it is a friendly encounter, sweetheart for most children eg. “hi sweetheart, is your mum home?”. It is also much easier to find ways to word things differently so you don’t need to use someone’s name!
  • Have a notebook handy – if you are making a phone call, meeting new people or need to make arrangements for something then always have a small notebook handy. This makes it much less stressful and you will find it easier to talk to someone as your focus is also on the notes you need to make.
  • Don’t face a mirror, screen or window with a reflection. It is always harder to talk to someone when you can see yourself talking. No one likes the way they look enough for it to not be distracting. Find a way to avoid facing anything like this, or cover it if needed, to reduce the chance of this happening.
  • Remember that you are an equal and valid person and you do not need to feel smaller or less capable than them. All humans have the same right to breathe air, have opinions and be happy. Don’t let your perception of them make you feel your right to an opinion is less.
  • Dress up, stand tall and smile. These sound silly but they are the most important tip of all. If you are lying on your bed in pyjamas and feeling rubbish you won’t talk with the same confidence and certainty as if you stand or sit tall, smile and feel confident in what you are wearing.

Do you have any tips I have missed? Do let me know in the comments below!

Chatting on social media

Chatting on social media is often easier as we associate it with our friends and family. If you can make complaints or arrange appointments on social media then why not try this?

Did you know that publicly contacting a complaints department on social media, without anger or swearing, is more likely to get a quick response and resolution than in an email? Brands want to maintain a good public appearance so this is why it is usually like this.

Do remember though to read your message before sending it to avoid embarrassing mishaps like adding kisses to the courier’s customer service message or similar.

What is your favourite social media platform? Have you ever complained on there? Let me know in the comments below.

If you found this helpful please share!

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